Friday, 13 January 2012

Plastic surgery, your views?

I am unhappy with my body. Very unhappy. So unhappy that sometimes I can't look in the mirror. When I do I get an overwhelming urge to cut off the bits I don't like. Of course I wouldn't but I can't stand the sight of certain parts of my body. My stomach and breasts to be precise.
Pregnancy, childbirth and yo yo dieting have destroyed my body. I have the classic "baby belly"- wrinkly and saggy. No amount of exercise can shift the drooping skin, believe me I've tried. My boobs have lost their pert-ness (if that's even a word?!). I have stretch marks, faded but still visible. My husband thinks I'm beautiful but he HAS to say that doesn't he? 

Last night I broke down. I stupidly looked in the mirror wearing only my underwear. The tears wouldn't stop, I was screaming and shouting at myself, telling myself how disgusting I am. I rang Mr.A hoping he would tell me I am beautiful and make me feel better. Of course he told me how beautiful I am but that didn't stop me from crying. No matter how many times I am told I am pretty/have a nice figure etc... it doesn't change my perception of myself, it never will. Then my husband said something that DID make me stop crying...

"Next year I'm going to pay for you to have a boob job and tummy tuck. If that's what you want I will pay for it, I just want you to be happy." Of course I laughed it off, we had spoken about surgery before and how I would love to get something done but it had never gone any further than that. But it stuck in my mind... why not? It WOULD make me happy I know it would...but then I would probably start to hate other parts of my body and become unhappy again. Don't get me wrong, I know plastic surgery is a BIG deal, not something to be taken lightly. I know things can go wrong and its not a quick fix to pure happiness. If I did decide to go ahead and have a breast augmentation and abdominoplasty I would make sure I did my research and went to a reputable clinic. I am seriously thinking about it. I know we should all love our bodies and learn to like what we have but I can't. I have tried and failed, miserably. My body has become an obsession. Looking in the mirror makes me feel physically sick. I don't want to feel that way anymore...

What are your views on plastic surgery? Is there anything you would have done? Maybe you have had surgery, I'd be very interested to hear your story. 
I understand some of you may read this and totally disagree, probably even judge me and that's fine, you're entitled to your opinion.


  1. I absolutely hate parts of my body too, so I can understand how you feel. I despise my legs, my calves to be exact, they are really big and bulky and they effect what I wear. I would have surgery in an instant, but it seems the only place I can get it in in S.E. Asia :( x

  2. I myself don't have a problem with plastic surgery. I believe if you truely truely 100% want to change something that you are unhappy with, its your body and your autonomy to do so. There are such things as going toooo far (I think we have all seen Heidi Montag recently ;)) BUT that being said, if shes happy with the way she looks who are we to argue! Her life and her body and her happiness. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be happy, everyone deserves it. I've even considered it myself and one day I probably will have botox ( I am beyond paranoid about wrinkles!) so girl if you want it, go for it! There is a very interesting youtube beauty guru who underwent the same procedures I think you mentioned, her name is Marlena from MakeUpGeekTV or something like that. She gives advice and explains her reasons for getting the procedure and its really interesting. Anyways I'm blabbering haha!

    On a personal note Holli, I really love how REAL your blog is, you write about what you want with your own opinions and its really refreshing and lovely to see :)

  3. Pregnancy and silly dieting has ruined my body too, and I have days like this. In fact, I've been reading your recent personal blog posts and we seem pretty similar.

    If you hate your body, you're always going to hate your body. I hate it now, being a size 12. And I hated it when I was stick thin after starving myself for months. That's why I wouldn't have plastic surgery... I would get obsessed with changing everything about me, but I would never find that 'perfect body' that I crave... that doesn't even exist!

    I think I'd rather spend the money on shit-loads of therapy to sort out my buggered head ;)

    But I'm not you. If you believe it would make you truly happy, then why not? I think your happiness is all that matters, and which decision would make you happier in the long-term.

    If you find a free, painless way of liking yourself, let me know!!


  4. Although part of me doesn't like the idea of surgery, I have always been tempted. I doubt i'll ever have the money or be brave enough to do it but i'd love to have my boobs done - just reshaped, not any bigger.. mind you that wouldn't be a terrible thing. Same with the tummy as well. I don't want to agreee but at the same time, life is too short.. why hate yourself that much? If you honestly think it'll make you happier and give you more confidence, then what's stopping you? xx

  5. Emma, why would you only be able to get the surgery in Asia? x

    Thanks Marvelle, I'm, glad you enjoy my blog :-) I'm going to have to search for this MakeupGeek TV I think, sounds interesting!x

    Lara, I am having therapy, we are yet to start on the "image" side of things though, just covered other bits so far like my past. I'm glad you can relate to me, it's nice to hear from people in the same boat as me. x

    Amymooo, I have never liked the idea of surgery either but I have become so unhappy I don't see any other options. The idea of the pain you go through after surgery scares the life out of me but I know in time it will heal and I don't think I would regret getting something done (unless of course something went drastically wrong!). x

  6. I think it's up to every person, I personally don't think I would do it. But if you have particular problem that is caused by childbirth etc. and you can't "fix" it the natural way, of course I think it's an option if thats what makes you happy.

    I also think that someone that has surgery because they're not happy with their body, should work on their body confidence BEFORE they do surgery to make sure they don't have the wrong image of themselves.. good luck x

  7. I could only get it in Asia because, a lot of Asian women have big calve muscles too so there is a market for it there. I've done quite a bit of research and I've not come across surgeons that do the op here (UK). x

  8. I've always thought about it, although my boyfriend doesn't agree with it and said I'd be taking away the things he fell in love with. But I told him when I'm older, after children and life, if I'm still unhappy with certain things and it's getting me down, I will probably change them. I think if it will make you feel a little better about yourself, then why not! It might help you find confidence in yourself if you have a little boost. Wishing you the best :) xx

  9. You've been really bold to share your thoughts here, I think that's admirable. As your husband has made the offer to you and you know it would solve the issues which are making you so upset then I'd say go for it. I guess research the procedures and make an educated choice.

  10. I dont disagree whatsoever. If i was to have anything done id probably get my nose done - i was bullied for it at school and those words have lived with me even into my 20s. Its awful what you take in and remember when you're so young. I hate anybody looking at me from the side, infact if anybody talks to me side-on i will ALWAYS turn to face them. I never have my photo taken with a full-on side view either. People say it's fine but i just dont believe them All i hear is the words that were said to me when i was younger :( I just dont know if i'd want to go through with it because of the risks - although i know id be soo much happier if i did do it. Im just a worrier and i reckon my anxiety over it is whats stopped me from doing it already...
    If you do decide to do it then make sure you do your research.. i know you can order brochures and arrange consultations with a few companies online which is really good :) Hope whatever you decide to do that its the right decision honeyy-pie :) xxx

    P.s; I passed you a little award/gave you a little mention on my blog:

  11. I don't like my nose either beth, from the front its really piggy. I dont dislike it enough to have surgery though.
    Sorry to hear you were bullied :( bullying is awful.
    Thanks for the little award, will go check it out now :) x

  12. I'm not keen on my body these days. Since having my Son, my stomach and boobs aren't what they used to be!

    But I don't think I could ever get plastic surgery. Its not that I don't agree with it, I just don't think I, personally, could get it done.

    In 2010 I had to have a partial mastectomy due to having a boob tumour, and I had a lot of my boob cut away. I was told by my surgeon that I could have an implant so my boobs would be the same size. I said no, because I didn't want part of me to be plastic, if that makes sense?

    I'm a worrier, and I always think "If I had unnecessary surgery, and it went wrong... what'd happen?".

    So as I think like this, I'm gonna have to learn to love my slightly saggy body!

    Tess xox

  13. I think there is no problem with plastic surgery as long as it's not taken to the extremes. At the end of the day I don't think people should be judged on whether they have had surgery or not, it's our body and if it means boosting our self esteem and allowing us to feel good about ourselves then why not?! Like you say it's not a quick fix but if it's something that would help get you to a place where you can look in the mirror and not feel that way you should research it and make an informed decision :) xx

    P.s. It sounds like you have an amazing husband, where can I get myself one of those?! Ha ha :)

  14. Lol Sadie, he is amazing! Always puts me and the kids first. He has his ar$e-hole moments but he's a man, its expected! x

  15. I wish you all the luck in the world. I 100% understand the wanting to cut bits off feeling, i've had that feeling regually since I was in my teens. If/when I am in a financial position to do something about it I will.


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